Sunday Mornings

Caveat: If you are overly religious or get offended reading anything slightly out of line with your religious views then do us both a favor and stop reading. While I am not going to slander God, Jesus, or any religion the last thing I want on this site is a Holy dispute.

Around the time Jadon was born, Celia and I began discussing the topic of religion and children; more so what we felt was the proper path to take for our child. While the discussion didn’t particularly pan around the idea of not attending a church service it was more geared to which type of service to attend. I do not have a vast knowledge regarding religion; I am unable to distinguish the difference between Lutheran and Baptist, but what I do know and believe is that the teachings of the Bible, regardless of your religious sect, provide children a good foundation of moral teachings. Celia and I came to an agreement that the most important thing was to introduce church to Jadon at a young age. Once we did that, we could then find the service that appealed to our needs and us.

The hardest part about attending church for me is agreeing to go and actually getting to the church. Growing up I attended church with some regularity but it was met with the same resistance. It all started when I was maybe 5 or 6 years old and began learning about Heaven and Hell. While I learned about Moses, Jesus, and the many other Bible stories, what I most took away from Sunday school was the evilness of Satan and how truly frightening Hell was. There would be times when I was a young boy that I would lie awake in my bed on Sunday evenings too scared to fall asleep because I didn’t want to die and go to Hell. At that age, the only reason I wanted to have faith was not to go to Hell. Unfortunately, I felt I was being mentally coerced to believe in God with the flip side being eternal persecution. As I grew older, I met other people who felt the same way I did. South Park even did an episode where the children develop an unprecedented level of commitment to church upon learning about Hell. Hilarious episode!

I eventually outgrew the fear that revolved around eternal damnation but remained reluctant to attend church. I felt as I got older that the service was overly boring with no attempt to connect to the younger audience in attendance. During my latter years of high school, my attendance began to drop but every time I did attend, I was able to count on my hand how many people were in my age bracket. The majority of the congregation had a minimum of 25 years on me and I think that number is rather generous. I also know at least 95% of the church’s donations come from that portion of the congregation, which meant the structure of the service was not intended for me. What really bothered me was the lack of interest in attempting to expand the congregation.

I remember my freshman year in high school my dad had volunteered as a youth teacher. In attempts to raise money for the church and broaden the youth fellowship, he proposed for the church to host a dance. Once the word circulated to the elder members of the church, they caused such a fuss that a meeting had to be held for my Dad to justify his thoughts. In the end, the dance was scratched. I believe many members of the church threatened to quit the church if the dance proceeded. I don’t know if they thought the dance would replicate MTV’s Spring Break week or an R. Kelly video but the message I received was that a group of teenagers were not welcome at the church. In the end, the combination of mind numbing services with no outreach to the community’s youth made me never want to go to church.

Once I graduated high school many years would pass with minimal church attendance. It wasn’t until Jadon was born that I began discussing it, and as I mentioned earlier, not for me but for Jadon. However good the intentions were of Celia and I we failed to attend church with Jadon. We found out it was much easier saying we wanted to attend church than it was to attend church. Once Hailey was born and I was home for R&R from Iraq Celia and I took both of our children to church for the first time. Jadon stayed with the childcare provided by the church and Hailey slept the entire time. The important thing was we had finally been true to our word and went to church.

Since I have permanently been home from Iraq we have taken the kids to church a couple time’s however I have drug my feet the last few times we went. This morning Celia finally said to me as I was pouting, “Would you stop already! It’s not like I’m asking you to hang out with a group of my girlfriends and talk about our menstrual cycles.” God I love that woman!

My resilience has been that the services have not connected to me. I feel I sit in the church for an hour and get no spiritual education in the end. We have had a couple of different Pastors, all with different styles. One Pastor did a decent job of keeping my interest and another managed to say a prayer for so long I forgot my head was bowed for prayer. I’m not exaggerating, I’ve heard some long prayers before but this particular prayer went on longer than the last Lord of the Rings movie.

As different Pastors are used the sermons are most definitely different. For example, this morning the Pastor requested the congregation come forth to receive the body and blood of Christ for Communion. I began to chuckle for two different reasons. The first reason being I once again thought of South Park when the kids said to Father Maxi, “Jesus’ body was made of bread so Jesus wants us to be cannibals?” The other thing I thought of was my own personal communion experience.

I might have been 10 or 11 years old when I remember doing communion for the first time. I heard what the Pastor had said regarding communion but it wasn’t like I understood the true meaning. As I sat on the bench I watched the scores of people flock to the front of the church, take a knee, and eventually eat the bread and consume the blood of Christ. I hadn’t the slightest idea what each person was doing instead focusing on the time each person spent on their knees. As it got to be my turn I walked to the front as my Dad was with me. I knelt down, paused a bit, and then began eating. I popped a couple pieces of bread in my mouth and washed it down with grape juice. I had so many pieces of bread that the ½ ounce of juice was not near enough, so I drank some more. I glanced over at my Dad who still had not touched anything. I quickly turned my head back down to the bread as I probably put 5 or 6 pieces of bread in my mouth. I drank a few more glasses of grape juice and noticed the people I approached with were still next to me. As began my third serving of bread my Dad whispered to me, “Andrew. It’s not a buffet!” That everybody, was my first communion.

I just hope I can get Jadon and Hailey excited about church, that they approach it differently than I. After noticing the way Hailey eats for only being 6 months old should be no problem getting her to communion if she’s anything like her Daddy.